Showing posts with label About This Blog. Show all posts
Showing posts with label About This Blog. Show all posts

Friday, August 27, 2010

Normal-Person Eating


Many of us who have battled our weight for the majority of our lives know that we can't really eat "normally." Our bodies have thus far precluded us from partaking in the joys of thoughtless eating, of enjoying food for food's sake rather than tricking ourselves to view food as a necessity and never a pleasure. We eliminate this, add more of that, limit, limit, limit. We count calories; we perform mind-numbing mathematical calculations that we could never in a million years answer correctly back in our old high school algebra classes.

We tell ourselves that this is how we'll get thin or get fit or get to whatever goal we set for ourselves and our bodies. And for those who strictly prescribe to these tenets of weight loss and fitness, this way of life works---and works well. I firmly believe that making a commitment to a healthy-eating lifestyle along with exercise will do the trick. I believe that diabetes-related complications, such as cardiovascular disease, can be alleviated by eating accordingly and exercising.

But part of me, the part who always felt like an outsider, just wants to be a normal person, a pizza-eating normal person.

There are times when I resent the burden of my own weight awareness, which I've carried day in and day out for the majority of my life. I resent the overanalyzation that occurs at the planning of every meal. I see commercials and programs on TV in which attractive women and men at particular restaurants eat with gusto, eat without intense scrutiny (of their food and of themselves). 

And they look normal to me.

Yet, I can't help but assign moral connotations to foods. I call some foods bad and sinful, whereas the accepted dieter's menu of foods, like vegetables and lean anything, are more positively labeled as good, on-plan foods. But who in this world is truly, wholly moral or immoral. Aren't we all sometimes sinful or make bad choices?

So why must my eating record be cleaner than my soul?

I suppose I called this blog Cupcakes & Fitness: Having My Cake and Eating It Too because I want so very badly to find a way to eat normally. I want to eat healthy, good-for-you foods, yes. But I want to still enjoy the social, pleasurable aspects of food and eating as well. I don't want to be the one to order a side salad while the rest of the table enjoys the house specialty. I want to be able to include myself in the festivities, in the act of the meal and not be the outsider sitting on the fringes of the table quietly nibbling lettuce. I want to be able to call for a pizza without guilt. I want to go to the amusement parks and have an ice cream cone, relishing the cool creaminess in the summer heat.

I want to have my cake and eat it too!

Is there a way to go to the restaurant and order the house specialty and not overindulge? a way to order a pizza and not eat the entire pie? a way to have an ice cream cone to celebrate the joys of summer? I hope with all my heart that there is a way, a way to eat normally, like naturally thin people.

I have a friend who has been very thin since high school. It's her natural body type and requires no effort on her part to maintain. She eats normally. She follows the school of Paula Deen and stays at or around 100 lb. She can order creamed chipped beef when we go out to breakfast and triple-cheese ravioli at dinner and not gain an ounce. 

I've observed her eat many times over the many years of our friendship. And I always notice the same thing. She NEVER overeats. She eats for pleasure and out of hunger, but she will eat only until those desires are satiated; she eats only until it stops being as pleasurable and never when she's no longer hungry. Can I ever learn to eat that way?

I love eating healthy. It makes me feel wonderful and clean. But there are some days and certain occasions that call for more freedom, the freedom to be normal. And I think (again, just for me) that it could be OK. The celebratory cake or the pizza I ordered to save money will all come out in the wash if I continue to practice responsible eating, by which I mean aiming to eat healthy always but not denying myself the pleasure of food on occasion, as in if I get married someday I'm not going to spit out my wedding cake!

And although I believe that everyone should follow the rules of healthy eating, such as eating whole grains, lean meats, and a lot of fruits and vegetables (and of course exercising and maintaining a healthy weight), and make those a part of our daily habits to avoid the devastating consequences of diabetes and obesity-related illnesses, I don't want to believe that food, in and of itself, is bad.

It's what we do with it and how we use and abuse it that damns us.

Deedah
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Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Goal Post!


All my life I’ve been the type of person who wants to set goals, the type of person who has lists and lists of things to accomplish running through my head. I collect ideas, file them away, and, most of the time, either forget about them or dismiss them altogether with some unsupported, weak excuse for why it was just impossible and not really worth pursuing. I’ve wanted to be an FBI agent, a restaurateur, a pastry chef, a doctor, a nurse, a personal trainer, a professional belly dancer; I’ve wanted to ride camels amongst the pyramids and mules at the Grand Canyon, have a Guinness in Ireland, go to every single Disney park in the world, pay my respects at Graceland during Elvis week; I’ve wanted to try eating alligator and deep-fried Twinkies; and much, much more. Honestly, I could have become/done any/all of those things if I had either 1) set my mind to it or 2) not been too afraid to attempt it.

My 20s were a decade of growing. I got to know myself, and I watched myself change. I gained experiences, some of which I should regret (and sometimes I do feel like I regret them, I won't lie). But in my heart I know that those experiences, good and bad, have determined the paths I have chosen in going forward as well as what I've chosen to leave behind.

I promised myself that my 30s would be a decade of doing. I'm going to set goals and not just fantasize about accomplishing them, settling instead for the status quo. So, without further ado, my first goal that I'm going to accomplish is running in the Disney's Princess Half-Marathon, which so happens to take place on my 33rd birthday weekend in February 2011!

Running a half-marathon would be a monumental experience for me. You see, I was the chubby girl who could barely walk, much less run, the dreaded mile. Always coming in last, always getting picked last, always full of shame. It seemed like the only running I could do was be the running fat joke of gym class.

I never dreamed back then that I would be able to run a full mile much less 6 miles or even 13.1 miles or that I would even want to! But what was a weakness and a cause for humiliation 25 years ago will soon be my greatest physical achievement to date (and a great big F-U moment dedicated to all those jerks who mooed at me in gym class all those years ago!)

To train for this half-marathon, I'm going to be following a novice Half-Marathon Training Program, which is the free version available online. I'm doing my best to eat a mostly clean diet of lots of fruits and vegetables, whole grains/complex carbs, and protein. Although I've already been running, I want to start from the beginning of this novice training program because I want to get used to running several days a week instead of just for kicks on the weekends.

So, yesterday, Monday July 5, I started with a 3-mile run. Tonight, I just got back from half an hour of light/moderate aerobics and half an hour of toning and stretching.

Today's Eats 

For breakfast, I had 97% Fat-Free Vans Waffles, 1 tbsp of almond butter, a banana, and a tall cup of coffee with Splenda. Perfect, sweet, breakfast!

For lunch, I had a turkey sandwich (two slices of honey multigrain bread, deli turkey, reduced-fat Sorento grated cheese, and Dijon mustard) and a box of fresh, delicious greens and Superfood Salad from my absolute fave Whole Foods salad bar, with 1 tbsp balsamic vinaigrette.

Along with some sweet summer berries for dessert!

For dinner I had a mish-mash of weekend leftovers, including my mom's amazing chicken baked with Campbells 98% Fat-Free Cream of Mushroom and brown rice, a turkey meatball, and some watermelon. I didn't take any pics because they wouldn't look all that appetizing!


Deedah
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Monday, July 5, 2010

Fun on the Fourth!


Summer is my favorite season. Living in the mid-Atlantic, I experience all four seasons. In the fall, the hills are ablaze with crimson and gold. Some days may still be warm, but in the breeze we catch a reminder of the cold to come. We've got cold winters, even getting 5 feet of snow this past February. Around here in the winter, the trees are bare, their gnarled, outstretched branches naked against the muted sunlight. The air bites you on the cheek and numbs your ears. Then springtime comes along, and life's green buds begin to appear against the gray. Some days are still chilly, but in the breeze is just the faintest scent of cherry blossom and young grass. Birds come back and flutter about carrying twigs and other debris for their nests. Then there's the summer. Summer is hot, hazy, and humid, with long stretches of 90+ degree days. I love it!

This past weekend was the final weekend before I start working on one of my first goals (post to come!), and it's also the quintessential "last supper" many of us have before embarking on our latest healthy pursuits. It was the July 4th long weekend. I'm not gonna lie, I didn't exercise and I ate some amazing summertime foods to celebrate. I don't have pics of the food, but just imagine BBQ, charcoal-grilled burgers (yes, plural), pizza, and, yes, even a cupcake. In future posts, you'll be seeing some of what goes in my mouth, both to showcase beautiful foods and to keep me accountable with regard to my portions and tendency to overindulge.


Summertime evokes memories of beaches, boardwalks, funnel cake(!), Old Bay-seasoned blue crabs piled high on brown paper table clothes, and, of course baseball. This weekend, I went to my first Nationals game at Nationals Park in DC. I'd been to games before (in Tampa and Milwaukee), but I'd never been to a Nationals home game. We had great seats!


 My boyfriend of 5 wonderful years was in town, and it was great to be able to spend time together. I miss him so much when we're apart (that's a post for another time). We see each other more or less every couple of months since he's had to move back to Wisconsin back in 2006. Even after all these years, I still cry at the airport when he leaves. But I wouldn't trade him for anyone else, local or otherwise. He's my best friend, and every tear I shed missing him is well worth it.


These pics can count for my "before" pictures:



Hopefully, my "after" pics will look something like this!:



This is Jessica Biel. I'm not really a fan, but I do admire her fit figure. She looks strong not skinny. Look at those shoulders! I know that I may not have the build (or the money and time) to ever look like Jessica Biel, but I want to get as close as my body will let me. And there's no losing in trying!

Till Tomorrow!

Deedah
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More About Deedah's Cupcakes & Fitness


Cupcakes and fitness. What in the world do those two things have in common? I love both and can't imagine giving up one for the sake of the other!

I've been on a quest to achieve the best level of fitness for my body for years. I want to stay healthy and live a long and active life. But like many people out there, I'm stuck with that last 10-15 pounds I can't seem to get rid of. I've tried almost every popular diet/eating style/exercise regimen there is, from the ultrarestrictive low-carb diets like Atkins and South Beach to Weight Watchers to the Eat Clean Diet. I couldn't stick to any of them. Sound familiar?

I've realized that food is a wonderful part of life. The sweet comfort of icing coating your tongue, the buttercream infusing your tastebuds; the heartiness of a fresh slice of artisan bread, crusty and rustic; filet mignon that melts in your mouth, cooked to perfection, with a glass of red wine, of course; the juice of a perfect peach dribbling down your chin and your hands while you revel in the purest taste of summer. I can't live like food is just a means to fuel my body because I truly find so much joy in it. I find joy in sharing meals with friends and loved ones, I find joy in cooking and baking and being creative with food, and I find joy in discovering new restaurants, whether it's a mom-and-pop dive or a Zagat-rated dining experience. But I know that I've got to be realistic and eat healthy (most of the time) to achieve my fitness goals and avoid the consequences of obesity, like diabetes and heart disease, which, unfortunately, plague both my parents and extended family on both sides. So I've got a tough road ahead in my journey to balance my love of food AND my love of fitness and exercise, as well as to drop those stubborn last pounds.

I say I love fitness and exercise. AND I DO! What do I love just as much as food? Working out, if you can believe it. I've always exercised (and enjoyed it), whether I was 175 pounds or 125 pounds. I enjoy feeling my body working hard, my muscles contracting and extending, throbbing after each rep. The high at the end of a summer run, as the sun beats down on my arms and face, drenching me in sweat and sunscreen, is euphoric. In the past couple of years, I've taken up running. I run for fun a couple of times a week either at the gym or around my neighborhood. The furthest I ever run is 6 miles, but most of the time I like to go for a nice 4-miler. This past June I ran in my first 5 K race, the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in Washington, DC. The feeling I got crossing the finish line is something I can't wait to recapture, and soon!

Eating Plan

I don't want to divorce food to be healthy. I want to forge a working relationship in which I CAN loose body fat, gain endurance and stamina, and get more fit and still have a cupcake every now and then. I still want to enjoy a full, real meal out in the real world. I don't want to order the side salad while everyone else has calamari! And I think moderation and portion size are key. I recently purchased a book by Jackie Warner (of Workout fame) entitled This Is Why You're Fat. In it, Ms. Warner talks about "eating clean" most of the time but allowing yourself two cheat meals a week of no more than 1,500 calories each. I don't plan on following her methods to the letter but rather follow the principles of such a method, using also what I've learned from the myriad of diets I've tried through the years.

This leads me to some of the goals I mentioned in my Welcome post on July 1. Although this blog is going to deal a lot with food and exercise, it will also include other aspects of living a full and fruitful life. I turn 33 next year! It's time to start living!

Up next, some Fourth of July firsts (and pics!) and my First goal: The Disney's Princess Half-Marathon

Stay tuned!

Deedah
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Thursday, July 1, 2010

Welcome!


Hi, and welcome to my brand new blog!


I’m so glad that I finally got it up and running. I’ve been reading blogs for a couple of years now (yes, I’m late to the party, but better late than never!), and I really appreciate all the wisdom and motivation I get every morning from the blogworld. From weight loss and exercise advice to great things to see, eat, and do, I love to read about REAL people living real lives, facing real challenges, and accomplishing real goals, just like me. Sure, the media is saturated with shows about what to eat, how to live, what to wear, etc., but, for me, there is always a certain disconnect that interferes with me absorbing and trusting what they have to say.

So, for those who are interested, this blog was created for the following purpose:

To give myself a creative outlet where I can journal my personal journey to accomplishing my fitness, health, and life goals without sacrificing too much of the simple pleasures in life (like cake!), as well as to be part of this dynamic (and fun) internet community.

Stay tuned for some pics, history, and a fresh set of goals!

Have a great 4th of July Weekend!

Deedah
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